Everyone Is a Food Writer Until......

In this miraculous age of technology and questionable life choices, we've arrived at a time so monumentally absurd that even Vir Sanghvis of the world would raise his well-manicured eyebrows in disbelief. Once upon a time—back in the golden days of journalism—genuine food critics were respected gatekeepers of gastronomy. They wielded pens like chefs did knives, slicing through mediocrity to deliver wisdom on the transformative power of a perfectly seared scallop. 

But now? Let me introduce you to the all-you-can-eat buffet of influencer culture, where anyone with a smartphone and an opinion has a hot take that can rival Michelin.  

Gone are the days when you needed years of training and a discerning palate to critique a three-hour tasting menu. Why bother leveling up your taste buds when you can just hit "go live" on Instagram with a slice of artisanal avocado toast that you grabbed from a trendy café? Enter the era of the food influencer—the modern-day equivalent of those ancient Roman emperors who gave the thumbs up or down to food, only this time with a Snapchat filter and a side of avocado. 

Forget about "depth" and "authenticity." Who needs them? All you really need to succeed in today’s food critique landscape is an Instagram account, a set of glossy teeth, and the uncanny ability to make a bowl of cereal look like a gourmet dish straight from Noma. Authenticity is overrated, and who even cares if a food influencer's claims about "the incredible crunch of this street taco" come with hours of research and an actual understanding of Mexican cuisine? The true talent lies in how dramatically you can speak with your mouth full while simultaneously filming yourself for a trendy audience unaware that "authenticity" is more than just a buzzword thrown around during brunch.

Meanwhile, the professional food critics—those wise sages who once navigated the labyrinth of spices, aromas, and culinary secrets—now cower in existential doubt. The restaurant world has morphed into a reality show where every enthusiastic diner with a smartphone assumes the role of the "expert," armed with hashtags like #FoodieFrenzy and #NotSoSecretMenu. They stalk five-star restaurants with the same fervor as they might approach a celebrity, snapping pics from every angle while mumbling the phrase “I really do know a lot about food” through bites of excessive pumpkin spice-tinged everything.

And as the food strolls by under their filtered gazes, who’s going to stop them? Certainly not the restaurant staff, who have begun validating these influencers’ inflated egos with comped meals and personalized greetings designed to generate free advertising on social media. Meanwhile, the art of food writing and genuine restaurant critique is as extinct as the dinosaur, with only a few erudite souls clambering for relevance, gasping for breath in a world dominated by the self-proclaimed “Pasta Queen” and “Sushi Sensation.”

Ironically, these influencers have never even cracked open a book on the history of food but sure can wax poetic about the "umami explosion" of a frozen microwave dinner. Who needs to know about terroir when your followers just want to see you slurp noodles while giving a thumbs-up to the camera every three bites? 

So here’s to you, brave food influencer warriors, trudging through bowls of matcha chia seed pudding and avocado-based everything. May you continue to blur the lines of professional critique and amateur enthusiasm. Yes, the bar for food commentary has plunged to a new low, but you’ve transformed the landscape into a kaleidoscopic paradise where everyone is both a critic and the star of their own culinary sitcom.

Everyone is a Food Writer until they face the reality of what food writing truly entails. It’s easy to proclaim the title of "food writer" from afar, but diving into the depths of this craft reveals a world of complexity, responsibility, and nuance. True food writing requires research and a commitment to authenticity. It involves tasting, exploring, and often, deeply understanding the stories behind the meals. It asks for humility—recognizing that food traditions come from diverse backgrounds and should be represented with respect and accuracy. It goes beyond mere descriptive adjectives to evoke the sensory experience of eating, capturing textures, aromas, and the social context surrounding meals. Food writing also demands a certain rigor in storytelling. Writers must develop a unique voice and style while ensuring clarity and engagement. They need to hone their skills in narrative structure, knowing when to share a personal anecdote and when to delve into technical details. 

We’re living in a time when food critics are locked in a battle for relevance against influencers armed with hashtags and filters. We might as well ask ourselves—what will our future palates look like? Will we begin drooling over epic images of multisyllabic dishes or just settle for a shot of a plant-based smoothie drenched in glitter? One thing's for sure: depth and quality might be on the back burner, but the #InstaPlate is sizzling with excitement. Bon appétit!